Spring Cleaning For the Mind
As the second quarter of the year starts many people participate in spring cleaning to refresh their homes after the cold from winter subsides. I encourage you to think about refreshing your headspace. Some suggestions include:
1. Positive Self- Talk
How do you talk to yourself internally and externally? Are you critical? Do you have unreasonably high expectations for yourself? Would someone you love feel hurt if you spoke to them in the same way? I encourage you to practice reframing, which in therapy terms is called cognitive restructuring. Cognitive restructuring is a CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) tool used to shift our thoughts and the pattern of negative self-talk into positive self-talk. Use kind adjectives towards yourself, and bring loving compassion when speaking about yourself, regardless if its aloud or in your head replacing the inner critical thoughts. For example instead of saying “I am worthless I can never do anything right”, replace it with “I am trying my best, it is okay to make mistakes, my worth is inherent not based on my behaviors”.
2. Letting Go of Worry
Given the state of the world, it makes a lot of sense to feel worried or anxious. Sometimes that worry can expand into spiraling thoughts or being unable to be present in the moment due to fear surrounding uncertainty of the future. To alleviate some of this anxiety I suggest setting a worry time, ideally around 20 minutes at the end of the day. Throughout the day when a worry thought arises, make a short note of it in your phone or in a notebook (one to two words or phrases), and postpone when you’re allowed to ruminate on your worry. In reality 91% of worries never come true (LaFreniere & Newman, 2020). During your designated worry time you’re allowed to think and try to problem solve any or all of the worries on your list, but when your timer goes off you must stop and move onto another task until the following day’s worry time. This technique allows yourself to not occupy the majority of the day with worry; while reminding yourself you can worry later on in the day. It creates space to problem solve for the concerns you may have while not allowing the worry to consume your thoughts.
3. Fact or Opinion?
Many thoughts pass through our minds throughout the day. It is important to know that not all of these thoughts are factually accurate or reflective of your beliefs or values. Sometimes thoughts are just intrusive and form based on information your brain is processing from the world around you with all of the memories and biological markers that allow you to process and compute information into a thought sequence. Intrusive thoughts can be unusual or unwanted, and may cause alarm leading to worry about Why would I even think that? However, when we fixate on intrusive thoughts, they just become larger because we are telling our brain to pay attention to this thought and as such, that thought grows or becomes more frequent in our minds. Instead, practice radical acceptance, notice and observe the thought, remind yourself a thought is not a fact or a reflection of your values or beliefs, and you do not have to act on the thought. The thought can just exist in your mind and eventually your mind will think of other things and move onto other tasks. You have control as to how much attention you wish to give your intrusive thoughts and if you choose to act on your thoughts.
-Chima
References
LaFreniere, L. S., & Newman, M. G. (2020). Exposing worry’s deceit: Percentage of untrue worries in generalized anxiety disorder treatment. Behavior Therapy, 51(3), 413-423. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.beth.2019.07.003