Exploring Anger

In my work with clients this month I noticed the theme of anger coming up often. Given recent world tragedies on top of some likely personal challenges and stressors, it makes a lot of sense that this emotion might be coming up for you. Something to keep in mind is that anger is not a “good” or “bad” emotion, emotions can have positive or negative valence assigned to them but are not morally “right” or “wrong”. Sure, some behavioral responses to an emotion such as anger may be more or less appropriate in particular settings but remind yourself that anger is just an emotional response, and it is normal and okay to experience it. If you are feeling anger arise in you, I suggest bringing some curiosity to the space anger is occupying in your body and mind. Often times, anger is a secondary emotion, meaning there are usually other emotions hiding out beneath our anger that might give us additional information what the emotion is trying to inform us. Under anger can be shame, embarrassment, hurt, sadness, betrayal, hunger, fatigue, guilt, loneliness, helplessness, jealous, contempt, insecurity, overwhelm, disappointment, pain, or fear. Addressing what is underneath anger is likely to lead you to different cognitive and behavioral responses when exploring and addressing your emotion. When you are exploring your emotions, specifically anger in this case, try to bring openness and nonjudgment to the experience, it is okay to feel what you are feeling. Your agency comes in when  you decide what to do with that feeling.

-Chima